When and How to Say No at Work - Career Advice Blog for Millennials

When and How to Say No at Work - Career Advice Blog for Millennials When was the last time you told a coworker no? If youre reading this, and looking for how to say no at work, the answer is probably never, cant remember or last time I did that, I got into trouble. Who can blame you? It’s hard to say no when someone is asking for your help. You don’t want to tarnish your image or hurt anyone’s feelings. Still, you dont have to be the always yes person, either. You only have so much time and energy to spare, and if you stretch your resources too thin, no ones really going to benefit in the end. The solution is to carefully choose the instances where you say no and learn how to say no at work so you say it in such a way that: You dont make the other person feel bad for asking you a favor You help them understand you have legitimate reasons for turning them down Youre able to manage your resources according to your personal capabilities and goals Your decision to say no turns out to be the wisest course of action after all When to Say No At Work Before you can learn how to say no at work, you need to know when it’s appropriate. Here are four times you should pass on a project. 1. You Dont Have Enough Time Remember the Samsung Galaxy Note 7 fiasco? It happened because the executives compromised quality to get the units out ASAP and outmaneuver their closest competitor. Needless to say, the strategy backfired on them big time. If someone asks you to complete a three-month project within three weeks, you are well within your rights to put your foot down. After all, you wouldnt want to be responsible for your companys version of Galaxy Note 7, would you?   2. Youll Compromise the Rest of Your Work Suppose you can work on that project that was literally dropped on you at the last minute. What about your other projects? Can you still handle those without sacrificing the quality thats always marked your work? If youre already juggling multiple assignments, the last thing you want is another one to get squeezed into your schedule like a killer whale in a kayak.   3. Youre 100 Percent Sure Youre Not up to the Task That’s not to say you shouldn’t take on a challenge, but if it’s completely outside your wheelhouse it’s appropriate to say no. The other person might say, I wouldnt ask you to do this if I didnt think you can do it. Thats flattering and all, but if taking on the assignment means having to learn new skills from scratch within a limited timeframe, youre better off passing it on to someone else who already has the skills.   4. Youll Do the Company More Harm Than Good Lets say your immediate supervisor asked you to do something questionable, or even illegal. Would you compromise your integrity and that of the companys by saying yes? Granted, youll risk the short-term ire of your boss when you say no. However, youll sleep better at night knowing that you kept your companys long-term interests at heart, and you were able to prevent another Enron/WorldCom/Madoff from happening. How to Say No At Work Now that you know when it’s okay to turn down a project, try one of these ways to say no. 1. Start Off Your Refusal on a Positive Note Look at it from the other persons perspective. If theyre asking you a favor, it means they think that favor is important, and youre the best person to ask it from. Therefore, saying no outright wouldnt be a good idea. Instead, think about the positives of the favor, and let the other person know youre aware of those by saying things like: Thank you for thinking about me! This project looks interesting. Id love to help out on this, but… Make sure you match your words with your tone and body language. Otherwise, the other person might think youre being insincere or patronizing. Practice making positive gestures every day, even if you dont feel like doing them, so theyll be second nature to you when you need them. 2. Be Kind but Firm With Your Refusal Just because youre honest doesnt mean you have to be harsh, and just because youre kind doesnt mean you have to be wishy-washy. Be considerate of the other persons feelings, but dont leave them any room to think youll eventually change your mind. For example: Unfortunately, my schedule is packed at the moment, so I wont be able to give this assignment the attention it deserves right now. I think this is a great idea, but Im not the best person to handle this. I know this strategy was crafted with the best intentions, but Im afraid I cant move forward with it. Notice how none of these statements put the blame on the one asking the favor? When you say anything even remotely negative, use I statements. By doing this, you make the other person less defensive and more open to reason. 3. Offer Alternatives If refusal isnt an option, compromise. Think about every possible way to accommodate the favor, like this: This might take a little longer than three weeks. Can we give it four to five weeks instead? Given my current workload, Im afraid I wont be able to finish this today, but I can split it into one-hour chunks to be spread out over the week. Does that work? I know someone wholl be more than happy to take this on. Want me to introduce you to them? Use this only when youre 100 percent positive that the person youre talking about can be trusted with the project. Otherwise, no one â€" including you â€" will be able to save face if it turns out that person cant do the project after all. These statements give room to negotiate the solution youre proposing. That way, the other person wont feel like you forced them into the compromise, and may even be thankful that you came up with such a brilliant idea! 4. Brace Yourself for the Other Persons Reaction No matter how kind and honest you are, its still possible that the other person will not take well to your refusal. While thats a perfectly understandable reaction from them, it shouldnt be a reason for you to change your mind on impulse. If you do, the other person will take that as a cue to do the same thing to you over and over again in the future, and thats not something you want to happen. Instead, practice these habits to diffuse hostile behavior from others. Stand your ground. If the person wants you to really, absolutely change your mind, repeat your previous refusal as gently as possible. Say something like Im really sorry, but I cant help you with this right now. Avoid taking their anger personally. If theres something else you need to work on, concentrate on that first. Dont listen to them if they start heaping abusive language on you, and dont think their anger will last forever. Unless they have a reputation for being vindictive, theyre not likely to stay angry with you til Kingdom Come. Empathize with them. If the person already asked several other people for help before you, its likely theyre already at the end of their rope. Be different from the others who turned them down flat, and say I understand this project mustve taken a lot out of you. I can’t take it on, but would you like to talk about it? You dont have to give them advice or anything like that. Its enough that you listen to, acknowledge and validate their feelings. By saying no to the wrong things, you free yourself up for the right things. Click To